Thank you.

I woke up in the morning.(feelin like P-diddy.) lol nah..i woke up with a fuckin insane hang over. i was misserable. I didnt evenn remember the movie! What even happend? But i thought to myself. Dallas+steven+dawn drunk= many possibilities. Whatever, i thought. it couldnt b to bad.... right?....I went in the bathroom and brushed my teeth and accomplished all my other morning doings. Then I thought. Why don't I hang out with shyler today? So. Most of you no shyler. Me and him have been friends since grade school.I loved him (as a friend), because he was such a great friend. He was always thier for me, always helping me with my problems. we are alwayys joking around together, we just always had fun(usually doing things we shouldnt be doing), and he was just different. and you could tell.Shyler had a hard child life. scratch that. shyler just has a hard life. Which causes him to do alot of things hes not supposed to do. Hes a bad ass kid, but u can tell somewere inside of him is a good kid, and he doesnt deserve half of the bull shit his life gives him. He was ALWAYS introuble. Weather its from school, to cops, to adults, or girlfriends. He was always doin stuff he wasnt supposed to do. He has alot of friends, and out of all those people, i dont think he trusts even one of them, i dont even think he trusts me. And its not my fault or his. Its because of his life that caused him to think, he cant trust not one person but himself. And i respect him for that. I was talking to jamie and she told me they used to date! i was like how come I never know anything? Well apparently it was a 6 month relationship. imagine that? never would have guessed. I didnt nno jamie was into bad boys..but watever haha. Anyway, I called shyler up and he didnt answer. but i knew were hed be. I left my house and walked to the park. and thier he was, with a good 15 kids, leaning up against a fence talking. I dodged everyone and went up to him. "hey." i sed. "eyy,watsup?" he sed with a cigaretee in his mouth. i took the cigarete out of his mouth and stepped on it. "hey, come on, thats my last one." he sed kinda laughing. i threw it on the ground and stepped on it. He sed later to his friends and me and him decided to go do "nothin' leagil" lol. We walked for a while and had silly conversations about Dr. phil being so bald, and the fact that michael jackson is a pedophile. We always had the best conversations. we snuck into the movies and watched some stupid movie with lindsey lohan? that chick seriously needs to stop acting. So we left cuz it was getting to be kinda homosexual. We went to The mall and decided to go shopping with our "five finger discount." ;). and i usually dont go stealing with other people, its to risky, but he was real good at it. and i trusted him. It was cool. we stole the most random pointless things, like pokemon cards, sunglasses, and a snuggie? that one was hard to steal lol. the only stuff we got with purpose was cigarettes and a switch blade. It was my kinda fun :D. It was around 8 so we decided just to hitch a ride bak to my place and make some food or somethin. We hitched with some old hippie guy, the van reeked with bear and drugs, and shyler figured it was cool to pop a cigarette in his mouth, it wouldnt do the smell any worse, thats for sure. He dropped us off and We walked in my place. no one was home(as usual), but I saw we had mail. I skipped right trew the magazines, bills, etc., and saw this one letter. It had my old adress on it. thats wen my heart dropped. i didnt want to have anything to do with my parents. i didnt want to talk to them, see them, hear them, or even think about them. mean while, shyler was making food and sitting on my counter. I flinched to throw the letter out. but i was curious wat they wanted. So i opened it. it was from my mom..." dear johnny, brooklyn, and dawn. I know you don't want to talk to me right now. But i have to tell You, that your father died in a car accident." Everything else i read beyond that point was a blur and i wasnt even thinking about what i was reading. My father....died? It wouldnt sink in to my brain. No matter how much i wanted to hate him, or how much i wanted to pretend i didnt care. I knew i did because my father wasnt always a horrible person. everything got blury as tears started to fill my eyes, and i was startled because of it. I never cry..and i didnt want to start now. I started paceing and waving my hands at my face to cool me off. My eyes were shut tight, and i was breathing sort of heavy, so no tears could escape. Thats when Shyler jumped off the counter and walked over to me. He picked up the letter and read it. He had no expresision, and he wasnt sad. he hated my father. He walked over to me slowly and pulled me to his chest. The more i thought about it the more i wanted to cry. So i just kept thinking, he kicked u guys out of ur house, he screamed at u,..he hit u. I pulled bak the tears but still felt sick. he held me tight. "come on, dont break on me now. Remember when we were 8? and we were both in that empty parking lot ridin our bikes cuz both our parents were flippin out on us and we sed we were gna run away, but we didnt? That was the last time u cried. and it was only because u slammed into that fence on ur bike because u were busy turned around talkin to me. u were ballin but i thought it was hysterical. that was the last time u ever had a tear in ur eye." he said trying to look at me but i hid my face in his shirt because i didnt want him so see me upset. "thanks." i sed quitley, because the more i talked the more my voice cracked, and i didnt want to cry. "any time dawn..anytime." he sed quitely. he was still hugging me and he still had no expression. This question popped into my head, and i just blurted it out like a dumb ass. i looked up at him. " are we more then friends?" i said to him and about a half second later i relized wat a dumb question that was. He smiled the slightest bit, but u could tell his mind was somewere else, he didnt seem surprised by my question at all. "we always have been." He sed. "then why have we always just stayed friends?" i asked, again, noticing it was a stupid question and i shoud just stop talking. "it aint that easy. We could never date. Because i am possitive i would disapoint you." he said staring off some were. As much as i wanted to tell him no. You wouldnt. I knew i would be lieng to him, and myself. I was friends with shyler since we were kids. i was thier for his first cut. when he broke his first arm. when he had his first girlfriend.The first time he got drunk. When he got in his first fight. And when his brother died. I was thier for him. All those times were i had to pull him out of these bad choices he would hav made if i wasnt thier, the times he was flipping out in his room, punching walls, because his parents were driving him crazy. No matter how much that always scared me wen he did that, it was either me or one of his other friends who were thier. and even through all that, no matter how much he cares about me, i new if we dated he would hurt me. and it wasnt his fault or mine. It was just the fact that hes shyler, and he could never get it right, because he was great at hurting the ones he cared for the most. so i didnt complain. plus, i didnt want to ruin our friendship in a 10 minute conversation. He stopped hugging me and we sat on the couch. We started talking about things like the shamwow, and how fat chicks shouldnt wear tight shirts. and how hannah montana is over rated, and also how american idol is nothing without paula. We started laughing and soon i just forgot about the hole thing. It got late and as we kept talking i just fell asleep. and when i woke up. All the lights wer turned off, i had magically appeared in my bed, my blankets were over me, and he was gone.